Quarter of UW Budget Spent on Treatments for Abe’s Athlete’s Foot

“Fucking children,” Says Freshman Passing Campus Tour

Professor Can’t Operate AV, Saves Face By Wasting Hour Of Class Time Anyway

Claustrophobia Sets in as Dorm Rooms Receive New Layer of Paint

Shelter Dog Seriously Needs to Stop Barking

Rheta's introduces fresh urine to fall drink line-up

Recovered coma patient praises sleek look of Student Center app

Roommate leaves passive aggressive post-it note on three-day-old vomit

Frat cheers Kavanaugh up with consolation bid

Bascom Hill big, Bascom Hill bad

Facing rising memes and increasing apathy, student satirists struggle to keep campus goofy

Business school freshman adds dad on LinkedIn

Bad throw followed by worse catch

Controversial Babcock gelatin to be replaced with precious elephant ivory

Watch out: this kooky girl is wearing a ‘Wisconsin Grandma’ shirt!

Lucky freshman gets into 0 Acapella groups

Rich asshole has ice dispenser on fridge

Sellery Residents start to ‘get it’.

Dorm mates begin to work out masturbation schedule

Student already fantasizing about obliterating TA with scournful eval